Am I Tempted by My Anger to Doubt God's Provision?

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There's no secret to it that life is really that stressful. It's not always caused by a lack of money but by people who tend to cause trouble in one's life. Such was the case of Moses. It really drives me nuts just thinking of how many times in numbers do we hear the people murmur, murmur and more murmurings. Some murmured after the surveying of the land, others murmured because they wanted to go back to being slaves in Egypt and I can't imagine the stress that old Moses suffered through for decades - especially that a 40 year wandering was there! 

Now it's time to consider the very incident that caused Moses to really go crazy and finally break it. It was worse than breaking the tablets of stone. Now it really showed how much he felt that enough is enough. 
Numbers 20:7-12 
And the LORD spake unto Moses, saying, [8] Take the rod, and gather thou the assembly together, thou, and Aaron thy brother, and speak ye unto the rock before their eyes; and it shall give forth his water, and thou shalt bring forth to them water out of the rock: so thou shalt give the congregation and their beasts drink. [9] And Moses took the rod from before the LORD, as He commanded him. [10] And Moses and Aaron gathered the congregation together before the rock, and he said unto them, Hear now, ye rebels; must we fetch you water out of this rock? [11] And Moses lifted up his hand, and with his rod he smote the rock twice: and the water came out abundantly, and the congregation drank, and their beasts also. [12] And the LORD spake unto Moses and Aaron, Because ye believed me not, to sanctify me in the eyes of the children of Israel, therefore ye shall not bring this congregation into the land which I have given them.

It just reminds me how often have I gotten angry and how often have I ignored that God is still in control? I thought about how the people were nagging over and over - wanting their every need met. Moses must have gotten so angry already that God's simple instruction to simply speak to the rock was ignored. Insetad, Moses got his stick and angrily threw a tantrum and struck the rock twice. He even dared to say, "Hear now ye rebels, must we fetch you water out of this rock?" I can't imagine how much his blood pressure shot up on that day!

It reminds me of how life isn't really fair and I ignore that God is good all the time. Life isn't meant to be fair but it's meant to help me look up to Him. I just thought that it's not easy to control my temper when I've had enough. Then I remembered being told by my Sunday school teacher, "See what it cost Moses and Aaron because they lost their temper?" I think of how often I doubt God's provision whenever I lose my temper. It's almost like a child whose angry over a parent withholding cookies before dinner. How many times have I did that? It really can't be counted. All I can do is ask God for His provision to help me control my temper and trust in Him as I do His will. 

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