How Often Have I Lost My Cool While Promoting Biblical Truth?

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I'm giving a thought on how often I lose my cool when I'm promoting biblical truth. I often remember how people discourage me from reading the Bible because they're not comfortable around someone who uses it for endless debates. I end up becoming a big Bible thumper whenever it comes to discussing the truth. Worse, I get so angry that I really want to cause physical harm to the person for the insults they're throwing at me. I just want to get even especially when these scoffers start telling me I'm stupid and start throwing their worst insults at me. What I often ignore is that the Bible tells me to turn the other cheek (Matthew 5:39). 

Seriously... is it even considered Christlike to respond to insults and put downs by throwing a fit of rage or worse hitting the other party physically? I always tell them that God is not a God that is all love, that I'm not a fan of sugar-coated preaching, that the Gospel is offensive towards lost sinners, that people must be offended with the truth, that God is angry with the wicked everyday but there's one thing that I tend to forget which is having the spirit of meekness towards people who don't know the truth. The Bible gives the command to defend the truth but to defend it in meekness and in fear (1 Peter 3:15-17). The truth must be told as it is without compromise but it must always come with the spirit of meekness and fear. This also includes turning the other cheek which means not letting an insult get the best of me. 

Do I even forget that persecution is to be expected and that I'm supposed to pray for these persecutors because they don't know what they're doing? So am I being Christlike when I start stooping down to their level or even lower? Do I forget that God may soon punish sin but He is patient towards people? Shouldn't I be patient towards scoffers just as God is patient with me? Is it going to attract people to Christ if I keep showing that I'm angry with them instead of being patient with them? Shouldn't I feel sorry for people lost in sin rather than keep arguing with them? Shouldn't I be gentle instead of doing stuff like slapping or even getting into a fistfight? 

I can win an argument but lose my testimony at the same time. Even if I win a fistfight or a boxing match with a scoffer but it will do no good to my testimony. I could be right about many things but without love it's nothing (1 Corinthians 13:2). What's the use if I know the Bible so much, I could take it into context, understand Greek and Hebrew, take everything into context if I'm forgetting that I need to be loving towards people who don't know the truth? I should remember that I was once lost and that it's only God's grace that got me to believe. They're blinded to the truth that they can't even ignore the obvious truths. Besides, am I not being arrogant whenever I lose my cool while promoting biblical truth? Shouldn't I be more loving even if I'm not to compromise the truth? 

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