Why I Believe David's Woes Also Sprang from a Polygamous Lifestyle
There's the statement that just because the Bible records it and speaks of it, doesn't mean that God approves of it. The Old Testament doesn't only talk about polygamy but also its consequences. Jacob ended up having up to four wives and it wasn't a happy family. Abraham had to get rid of Hagar because one wife is enough. Elkanah's two wives, Hannan and Peninah, can't even get along just like Sarah and Hagar. Eventually, David himself, while a man after God's own heart, made the serious mistake of having a polygamous lifestyle. At first, I wondered why polygamy was the norm but God never intended it. Even back in the Garden of Eden - Adam only had one wife and that was Eve. God didn't create Eve plus more women for Adam.
You can think of how David's woes can be caused by a polygamous lifestyle. I think he should've just dropped the offer to marry one of the daughters of the godless Saul. True, Jonathan was a godly man but the same can't be said about Michal. David would later meet the godly Abigail though he also married Ahinoam of Jezreel. Though he also married a Gentile princess from Geshur from a small Aramean kingdom named Maacah. Haggith gave birth to Adonijah another usurper. Abitai, Eglah, and Bathsheba were listed last. David had so many wives it was impossible for him to monitor all his children. In fact, three of his children were problematic - his firstborn Amnon via Ahinoam, Absalom via Maacah, and Adonijah by Haggith. He could've stopped having more wives but you know the sinful desire is never satisfied. The lust of the flesh soon led him to commit adultery with a woman young enough to be his daughter named Bathsheba. 2 Samuel 12 tells us the curse that fell upon him because he stole the wife of a trusted officer of his, namely Uriah the Hittite. David himself had a hard time monitoring his own children that it led to Amnon raping Tamar (his daughter by Maacah and Absalom's full sister) and eventually Absalom's rebellion for the throne.
The Bible is rather silent on the growing up years of David's children. Why Amnon grew to desire his paternal half-sister Tamar is something. Maybe, David never kept a boundary between the boys and the girls. Maybe, Amnon saw his half-sister Tamar growing up to become so attractive. Maybe, favoritism played a part as to why Absalom became a spoiled brat. Absalom would later challenge his own father's authority with the royal concubines of the latter. Maybe, David never had plans for Solomon to be king either considering David was 50 when he first had Solomon. Either way, having so many wives and other women not recorded would mean David was too busy pleasing all his women but to no avail. It's easy to think he actually enjoyed them but ended up otherwise. David soon only had Bathsheba as his only love.
Sadly, Solomon himself didn't learn from the mistakes of his father and ended up multiplying it even worse. Solomon had a total of 700 women considered as wives and 300 concubines (who were higher than slaves but lower than a formal wife). Solomon should've seen the consequence of David's actions since he grew up in that kind of household. Solomon could've taken down notes and see all his much older half-siblings and their chaos because there are too many women. Solomon could've seen why his father failed and that his multiple political marriages would do more harm than good. David's marrying a Gentile princess was also part of the woes. David was in woe especially when he wasn't even sure Absalom was saved in contrast when his son born out of adultery died in infancy. David mentioned he would go to his son conceived in sin but he wasn't sure about Absalom. Solomon should've stuck to his love story in the Song of Solomon - the only unnamed woman he ever loved. Later, the Shulamite woman was longing for Solomon after he pursued to fill his harem. A closer analysis of the Song of Solomon will tell you that Solomon soon had other women (Song of Solomon 6:8) and that he neglected his first love.
Just had me thinking - polygamy sounds good on paper but not in real life. A lot of kings tend to make wrong decisions because of it. Muslim countries are far from functioning well because of polygamy. I even wonder how does a Muslim man with more than one wife manage to handle all his wives. Some Muslims even go as far as to build each wife another house and visits all of them. It's already a headache to support one housewife then how much more for four housewives? A housewife must be paid and supported for all the work she does. That's why I was thinking that it was wrong for me to envy David and Solomon for having all their women since they could only enjoy one.
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