God Refuses to Remove My Weaknesses

I feel that there's such a time when everything is "perfectly fine" but it gets messed up. God allows trouble in life. I always get taunted by such questions like if God is so good then why am I not having so much worldly wealth. This makes me question why God even allows the wicked to prosper and those who are His to suffer. It makes me think of Psalm 73. That is where David mentions about how often the wicked are allowed to prosper. Many people today are so wicked and yet they live like they have the "perfect life" while I'm stuck with one problem after the other. David declares his ignorance in the same chapter that he was foolish to envy their prosperity.

It always had me thinking of why did God give me a weakness. It always had me frustrated to think that it's God's will and that I must accept it. He's in control and He allows the effects of sin to take its place on sinful humanity. God could have just ended it all but He has chosen not to. What I often fail to remember is that God's sovereignty is based on His holiness. If He gave me a weakness then there must be a reason. It reminds me of the whole truth of the thorn in the flesh (2 Corinthians 12:7). This thorn in the flesh is given so nobody can exalt themselves.

I figured out that whenever I pray for God to remove my weakness then am I praying after the pattern taught by Jesus? Did the Lord's prayer ask for people to remove their weaknesses and hardships? Instead the priority of the Lord's prayer has always been, "Thy will be done on Earth as it is in Heaven." The strange truth in 2 Corinthians 12:9 is that the strength is made perfect in weakness. Many times, I feel that verse is one painful truth that's incredibly hard to swallow. But there's one thing that God's strength is displayed in human weakness. He displays His power as a perfect God who can demonstrate His power through imperfect humans. 

I thought about it what if I didn't have that weakness or my thorn in the flesh. I think it would be very easy to forget God. I could foolishly think that only if God would give me an easy life then I'd worship Him 24/7. Instead, it would be the opposite. When Solomon wrote Ecclesiastes, he was mentioning how often vanity is vanity especially in the pursuit of an easy life. He really saw how he made a fool out of himself with all his sexual immoralities with heathen women. David was a man after God's own heart but he also committed adultery with Bathsheba. God used bad times to bring them back on track.

So what's with unfortunate incidents? I believe they too are part of the flesh. They would help reveal something that could have been done. A near accident that hit me today or several mistakes I made ended up with my mixed reaction. I felt like why did God allow me to commit such mistakes. I would easily get frustrated whenever I'm reminded that it's God will. I felt like that several times God allowed me to make a mistake allowed me to pass Gospel tracts to these people. It also made me think of my shortcomings of how inattentive I can get. He continuously allowed those shortcomings not because He's mean and unkind but because He wants me to be in continuous prayer and fellowship. I asked God several times to remove my inattentiveness but He wouldn't. I start to doubt why He hasn't done it but maybe it's because if He did I would eventually glorify in myself. 

If God gave me a river then it would be easy for me to stray away. Instead, God chooses to give me provision day per day. I have to pray day by day for this provision. When He gave manna to the Israelites they were to gather enough for the day and kept none for tomorrow. I'd be foolish to think that God would remove all my problems. If He did then He would no longer be a holy God who would use affliction to keep me away from my sinfulness. But He has a purpose for all the problems I'm facing. Maybe it's because I complain too much. Maybe it's because I got arrogant. I don't know what purpose He has in allowing me to face problems but I'd be foolish not to trust His reasoning.

I could say that God keeps me in my weakness because the glory is His and His alone. I can't claim the glory for myself. The changed life of the believer is God's wonderful work. The good works that come forth is a result of God's grace (Ephesians 2:8-10). It sounds cruel to my sinful nature that He allows me to have a weakness. But the one truth is that this weakness is meant to keep me praying and faithful and in fellowship. Why should I pray that God remove my weaknesses once and for all instead of God help me overcome my weakness day by day?